Ghosting

The ghosting game is second nature to anyone lucky enough to be apart of the online dating scene. Stemming from the literal sense of someone becoming a ghost and disappearing from communication. The cowards way out, I like to call it. Instead of having the decency to tell someone you simply are not feeling the connection, we decide to cut all contact so they 'get the picture'. When I talk to people about my hatred towards ghosting I ask them one question. "Would you walk away half-way through a face-to-face conversation with someone?" Because without an explanation that's exactly what you're doing. Leaving someone hanging, grasping onto the idea of potential contact is the pinnacle of selfishness.

The mind is its own enemy. As humans we are wired to avoid rejection, but when we are drip fed small doses of interaction, we see that as a win. This is where 'the chase' comes into play. Similar to gambling, our brain releases dopamine the 'feel good' hormone when we achieve or win a prize. So our minds are at their lowest when we have no contact, but we are flooded with joy when we are receiving the bare minimum from a person. But it takes two to play the ghosting game, the one who choses to ghost and the one who tolerates it. Instead of allowing this behaviour, call it out. If you feel the radio silence approaching, send them a message, be direct and address the obvious.

Life is time and both are short. We control who takes up our time, so why waste your life on someone who can't even send you a simple three second message. If someone is giving you enough, you won't be confused, there's a difference between a ghost and person. One is physically here and the other is in your past.